Suitors Now Prefer Our Maids To Our Daughters For Marriage Why not?
Yes, it happens because we devote time in training the maids on how to cook well, how to clean the house and on good mannerisms while leaving our own daughters untrained.
We overwork the maids and they adjust with equanimity because they need us to survive.
The maids turn out to manage the indignation and insolence we and our children subject them to. All these make the maids better wives who can manage even the angriest of men.
Our precious daughters are pampered through nursery and primary schools. They speak the English we want and know all the cartoon slangs by heart. We beat the maids blue black if they ever ask our girls to help out in domestic duties. They see kitchen things as maids’ things.
The girls move from boarding schools to the university, do their NYSC, Masters and get a job. Of course, they are ripe for marriage and you wish that to happen soon.
From one relationship to another, the same story. The guys would parade and dump them. They are only good in outings and red carpet functions.
The boys de-commit when they notice that the possible wife cannot cook, arrange things and are very domestically untrained. The rich guys can manage as they would mitigate the handicap by hiring a domestic help. Not all guys can afford this for a start.
The upcoming and very sensitive guys who would make good husbands, fathers and leaders would not manage these parents’ inflicted shortcomings. They would settle for well trained ones. They know the value and the pride in hosting friends at home to delicious delicacies prepared by a wife.
Not all your maids would remain your servants forever. Some of them would finally do part-time studies and like a train, get to their God ordained destinations sooner or later.
Like a perfume, good guys perceive well trained wife materials from afar and dump the daughters of the bourgeois like hot iron. Long time happiness is at stake. No explanation is given. Sometimes, the sack message is made through a social medium.
Let your daughters learn what you teach your maids to make them compete for the few available good men if marriage is important to them. There are few guys who believe that marriage is for better for worse.
Don’t be deceived; love is an active verb. Yes it is. You love; you loved; and you used to love. You can also hate who you used to love. Therefore, some men are immune to pre-marital love blindness.
In practice, love can’t cover the stench of bad early formation of our daughters.
Right now, educated former maids are now cornering better men on offer because they possess the requisite or set skills the highly perceptible and ready husband materials need.
Mothers please take note.
(Posted with the permission of the author, Grace Essen)
Essen’s advise is timely as so many young women struggle to take charge of their homes after marriage and after acquiring top class education.
However, it is recommended that we raise our daughters beyond the level of the maids.
They must be trained not only on domestic chores, but to a level where they guide the rustic maids. This is because they can, themselves handle the house chores, they are thoroughly schooled in domestic science and home economics.
Multitasking, planning and organising are part of what make them completely take charge of their businesses, careers and homes.
Daughters must learn that they should not abdicate their responsibilities or hand over their homes and children to strangers.
They should direct affairs and dictate the pace. They must stay focused on the guidelines of the Bible passage on the virtuous woman in Proverbs 31.
They are domestic and business directors. Well brought up women know how to build and manage domestic support systems, That is how a woman is wired.
Our sons must also be trained to assist and see their wives as partners and not as bond-women.
The civilised world has come to understand this and everyone in those climes know their limits and feel at home with shared responsibilities. That is why they are called civilised.
Boris Johnson, British Prime Minister is known to take bicycle rides to nearby grocery stores to get supplies for the house.
That is also not to say that wives do not understand that they are subject to the leadership of husbands.
The legal children of the homes are entrepreneurs, who tour international conferences and prepare boardroom briefs.
Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala 
Mrs Ibukun Awosika 
Meghan Markle and Mum
Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala would not get to the level where she currently is if she has to daily sweeps dusts and scrub a 5 or 7-bedroom duplex. Same goes for Ibukun Awosika, Oprah Winfrey, Michelle Obama, Angela Merkel and Meghan Markle.
Oprah and Michelle Obama 
Angela Merkel, German Chancellor 
Oby Ezekwesili
Most domestic chores have been outsourced by these amazing women who have also set standards for the domestic staff.
They set the standards because they have superior knowledge and know what to to do themselves.
Just like Angela Markel, no woman should totally abdicate her domestic responsibilities but there is a limit.
(Comments welcome)
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